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so she says;






mechanical
Monday, October 06, 2008

i may have a little more that the used to, i am losing more than the used to

a not-so-smooth-lovely-year has gone. was caught back by what i answered her during lunch. we have been in control loving it. perhaps i have other things to concern about. or maybe, we have find that stage to let the world set in. are we fool by the rocks on the shelves?

i feel sick, a little way too much when i look it chalking up. i just wanna rip everything apart. its not fucking mine. i stop asking someone from above why me when things dont go my way. i stop beliving beings can help me. i stop talking about things that cant be done. i literally drop my hands by my side.

i struggle moments like this, if i do have the courage to end everything, to die beautifully.

for this, i speak to someone above, take me away, beautifully, painlessly.

@10:37 PM